English Plus Magazine
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Current Theme: Corruption and Oligarchy
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Danny's Column
Finding Peace After Generations of Conflict: Can We Let Go of Grudges?
Let’s be honest—learning to love or even trust someone after years of conflict and pain is one of the hardest things we can imagine. History is full of long-standing grudges, deep wounds, and unresolved issues that seem impossible to heal. But here’s the thing: if we want a better world for our children and the generations to come, it’s a challenge we can’t afford to ignore. It’s not about forgetting the past or acting like everything is fine. It’s about finding a way forward, despite all the scars and mistrust.
Think about it. When conflict becomes so deeply ingrained that it spans generations, it creates an automatic divide. We inherit the grudges, the suspicions, and the fears of our ancestors without even questioning why. But when you stop and ask, “Where does this lead?” it becomes clear that continuing down the same path only promises more of the same: more pain, more loss, and, frankly, no winners.
Because that’s the thing—there are never any real winners in conflict. Sure, one side may claim victory, but the cost is always too high. Loss of life, shattered communities, and generational trauma don’t equal a win for anyone. The idea of winners and losers in conflict is a dangerous illusion. Both sides lose something in the process, whether it’s lives, trust, or the ability to live without fear. And as long as we frame conflicts in terms of winning and losing, peace will always be out of reach.
True peace can only happen when we start thinking in terms of win-win solutions. That means finding resolutions that allow both sides to heal, to feel heard, and to move forward with dignity. This doesn’t mean everyone gets exactly what they want. It means working toward solutions where both sides feel like they’ve gained something valuable—a sense of justice, security, and hope for the future. Peace, after all, can’t be forced on anyone. It has to be built through mutual understanding, compromise, and the willingness to see the humanity in those we’ve considered enemies for too long.
A win-win resolution is the only way forward because anything less keeps the cycle of resentment and revenge alive. If one side feels like they’ve lost, even after the fighting stops, the seeds of future conflict are planted. But if both sides walk away feeling like they’ve regained something—whether it’s safety, recognition, or a new beginning—that’s where real, lasting peace begins.
We can’t undo the past, but we can decide what happens next. It’s not about romanticizing a perfect world where everyone suddenly gets along. It’s about being realistic and recognizing that peace is the only viable option if we want a future that’s worth living in. We’ve seen what war and division do. We know the cost of hate. Maybe it’s time to see what happens when we try something different—when we lean into the discomfort of forgiveness and the hard work of rebuilding.
This isn’t about being weak or letting go of justice. It’s about understanding that real strength comes from moving forward despite everything. It’s about choosing to be the generation that doesn’t pass on the hatred, but passes on the lesson that peace, no matter how difficult, is always worth pursuing.
So, where do we start? Maybe with a conversation, an olive branch, or even just by challenging the narratives we’ve been handed down. It’s not going to be easy, and it certainly won’t happen overnight. But if we truly care about the future, we owe it to ourselves—and to those who come after us—to try.
We’ve spent enough time in conflict. Let’s see what we can build when we dare to love and trust again. And let’s make sure that as we do, everyone wins.
Danny Ballan
Editor-in-Chief
English Plus Magazine
English Plus Magazine
Beyond the Coffee: Uncovering the Heart of French Café Culture
Explore the unique social fabric of France woven within its cafes. Learn why these spaces are much more than just places to grab a coffee.
Facades: When Appearances Deceive
What lies behind a facade? Explore the literal and figurative meanings of this word, from architecture to personal fronts. Examples included!
The Placebo Effect: How Your Mind Can Influence Your Body
Discover the placebo effect, a fascinating phenomenon where belief alone can trigger real changes in the body. Explore how it works and its implications for health and well-being.
Why the Pen is Mightier than the Sword
Words or force: which holds more power? Explore the proverb “The pen is mightier than the sword,” its meaning, usage, and when it might miss the mark.
Reclaiming Your Power: Alice Walker on Self-Belief
Explore Alice Walker’s quote: “The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” Learn how to break free from limiting beliefs and reclaim your agency.
Black Holes: The Cosmic Spaghetti Makers
Ever wondered what would happen if you fell into a black hole? Get ready for the cosmic stretch – learn about the bizarre phenomenon of spaghettification.
Fuel Your Brain: How Nutrition Powers Learning and Success
Discover how the foods you eat impact your brain’s ability to learn, focus, and thrive. Learn about the essential nutrients for a healthy brain and how you can make choices that boost academic success.
Discover Your Core Values: The Key to Self-Understanding and a Better Life
Unlock a more fulfilling life by understanding your core values. This guide helps you define what matters most, make better decisions, and live with greater purpose.
Harangue: Is It a Tirade or a Necessary Speech?
What is a harangue? Learn the nuances of this word, when it’s just a rant, and when it might hold purpose. Examples included!
The Dunning-Kruger Effect: Why Some People Overestimate Themselves
Uncover the Dunning-Kruger effect, the fascinating reason why some people struggle to accurately assess their own skills and abilities. Learn how this cognitive bias works and why it matters.
Is the Grass Really Greener on the Other Side?
Is the grass always greener elsewhere? We explore this proverb’s meaning, examine when it applies (and when it doesn’t), and discover how to counter this mindset.
The Power of Attitude: How Your Reactions Shape Your Life
Explore Charles R. Swindoll’s famous quote: “Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.” Learn when to use this mindset for empowerment and when it falls short.
Octopuses: The Three-Hearted Wonders of the Sea
Octopuses have three hearts? That’s right! Dive into the amazing world of octopus biology and discover why these creatures need this unique circulatory system.
Unveiling the Top 10 Ancient Innovations that Shaped Education
Discover the top 10 ancient inventions and practices that revolutionized learning, from the first writing systems to groundbreaking libraries. Get inspired for your own learning journey!
Animation Careers: Discover What It Takes to Bring Art to Life
Is animation your passion? Dive into the life of an animator, exploring their daily tasks, skills needed, and how to build a career in this vibrant field.
Why the Best Things in Life Are Free
Is the adage “The best things in life are free” always true? Let’s explore this proverb with examples and discover when it works — and when it doesn’t.
Don Ronin Stories
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